so so much

I haven't updated in forever. So much stuff.

for those who don't know by now, I have kept it from people who didn't need stress, Aidie has had problems. around easter 2008, he stopped talking. and walking. and eating. and smiling. after a few months he'd regained all those skills, to some extent. at 21 months old, he was evaluated by specialists, and was placed at a 10 month level in cognitive development, and 6 months in Socio-emotional development. up until he stopped, around easter, he was actually pretty advanced, had a larger than average vocabulary, could feed himself, identify letters, shapes. he was a bit ahead of the curve.
He was very violent, attacking himself and others, but throught the help of twice weekly therapists, he's learned more words back, and has fewer outbursts. He hasn't broken my nose in months now. :)
He has learned back a few words, a little over a dozen. He walks without holding on tho things again, and runs pretty well, though he's clumsy still.
He knocked out his 2 front teeth in a tantrum, (he was mad, and running, and ran into the back of the truck. He cried for a second, bled buckets, but all in all it barely registered.) and he has 2 capped teeth as well, along with countless chips filled in. he's already been to the dentist more times than his brother. and let me tell you, there is nothing like everyone at the dentists office comeing together and working in concert to have to hold down the gigantic 2 year old. It really sucks, feels like were torturing him.
He still doesn't eat. hes living off the food I sneak to him(yogurt in the sippy), breastmilk, peanut butter crackers, and pediasure. with the occasional natural cheeto thrown in, and all the Oreo cookies he can sneak.
He hates clothes, diapers, socks, shoes on most days. I don't know what I'll do when he outgrows footie jammies. Becasue while he hates them, he cant get out of them and this way he doesn't freeze.
HE sleeps on the coffee table, though when I replaced his toddler matress with a board, he napped there for the first time in forever. He only likes his baths extremely hot, or really cold, and theres never telling which will be right, I get to draw it up and guess, and if its wrong wait a hour for him to recover and draw up the right one.
He loves TV and radio, one must be on at all times for him to function. it can be CNN or NPR, and long as its on.
most days his family is the only people he can tolerate. We cant go out in public often, if there are too many people around he hides his face and sobs and shakes, or closes his eyes, screams, and beats himself in the head till he's bloody.
He's still gigantic, 38 pounds, wearing size 3 and 4Tand size 9 shoes.He had his first haircut a few months ago, I had to hold him down and buzz him. it took hours because I gave him breaks to get a grip, and we haven't done it since, but I had to, he was getting dreds.

He had an MRI done in June, and other than finding out he had breathing problems, (the had to tube him, he stopped breathing, my poor baby...) it didn't show anything. He's also been tested for lead twice, and had his thyroid tested twice, the second on each due to hospital mix up. Both werefine. We are waiting on the results of his genetic testing, and if it shows anything, we'll be having a micro-array done to find out exactly what it is. Hopefully.

So, so far, we have 2 dignosies. "Macrocephaly", (did i mention his giant head? it doesn't look that big, to the eye, but he wears the same size hats as Lucas, and its way off the pecentile charts.)
and "Pervasive Developmental Disorder, Non-Specified."

Thats what is going on over here right now.
on happier news, Lucas got his white belt in Karate, and Kris is back to work, 6-10s, so at least we got to keep insurance on Aidan.

I often wondered in the beginning, why this happened to my baby. I cried over it, and still do, sometimes. But I figure, it happened to our baby because we are stong enough for it to have happened to our baby. If it had to happen to some little boy, I have to be happy that it was us, because we can do this. I can't imagine what this would do to parents who couldn't take it.

I can try to add pix, but i'm not sure if it'll time out on me, there may only be a few.

wow, its been a while!

I dont even know where to start. the world spins faster, and being dizzy keeps me on my toes. I'll upload pix of the boys tommorrow, but for now, i'm going to bed, because the little monsteris finally sleeping in his bed again, for the first time in a month, after this nasty cold he had, and i'm looking forward to stretching out to sleep. of course, now that i've said this, he's gonna wake up, it would only happen that way, right?

ranty

I am so tired of being made to feel like I'm doing something wrong because Aidan is still nursing! Yeah, it's wonderful that other babies are totally weaned to a cup, except its formula, and that's not as great, in my book. and this other baby weaned sooo long ago, and whatever. I don't care. it's not easy nursing, but it's good for him, and it makes him happy, so I do. I'd love to be able to not do it, at least, most days, but I do. Because he is comforted by it, I am lucky enough to get to stay at home and do it, and you know what, he's only 14 monhs old. apperently, he should be driving a car, and speaking in full sentences by now, how dare he still be a baby?! And you know who you are, and I'm tired of it.

End Rant.

On Halloween:

Scary Devil Lucas!

He wanted to be scary, I asked him,

"What's the Scariest thing you can think of?"
"The Devil."

so, he was.

And the Stinker being cute,

And being a stinker.

picture

Lucas got his Bobcat badge! He's a tiger cub now! I'll add Halloween pictures as soon as I find them, I'm tired, and apparently they are hiding somewhere...

mommy is goonie!

I'm getting my tooth pulled tomm! It broke more today, I had been putting it off, cause it was just cracked, but getting hit in the face by a big ol head lately as well as the bathroom cabinet door officially broke it, the nerve is way exposed, and I've got pennicillin and tylenol 3. Thanks to my totally wonderful mom, I get it done tommorrow! I was going to have to wait until thursday just to get looked at, but she made some calls cause I was out of my mind with pain and didn't even think of the emergency place I want to when aid was just a week old bitty bit. my mom rocks!
In other news, Aidan my be over the stomach flu, were back to one poo a day, and I believe Lucas' webkin is dying. Dont buy your kid a webkin, no matter how much they beg, just FYI. It ends up being bored mommy-crack. Lucas wants more for his birthday, I dont know what to do.

pictures

birthday!

Aidan is one! Oh yes he is! I just got through decorating his cake, (from scratch, btw, lol) and my hands are hurting, 'specially the gimpy one. It has Moose A. Moose, and Zee, his favorite things in the world right now. I'll load pics after the party tomorrow, If I'm not too exhausted. I have to make 24 cupcakes for the Cub scout meeting on Monday too. I always said I love baking, but this is getting ridiculous.

i know i'm a dork, but...

The Defuser isn't a Superhero! He's a gadget guy. He's a lame-O Batman.
Hyper Strike is a Superhero! Darn you, Stan Lee, you big money-grubbing sell out! Darn you to heck!

And now I'm Done.

I don't need no steenkin crib!

Seriously, he sleeps so much better now!

PISHA!

Days before he turned 10 months!

been busy, but guess what!

Aidan Started walking, really walking, on Wednesday! Its so cute, like, remember when you were little and played "mother may I?" and you got to take giant steps or duck steps, or teeny-weeny baby steps? and the baby steps were all exagerated and tiny? he walks like that. I'll have to get a video of it before he stops and just walks like a big kid. I cant believe it, its crazy! He's barely 10 months old!

wow, updating now! However random it is.

We've been busy. Obviously. Anyway, Lucas starts school on the 27th. I think. Aidan took his first steps last night! Four big strong steps, to his brother. He's gonna be 10 months on Sunday! Lucas had to call every Grandma and tell them, he was so proud! We've been having lots of fun, so it's a good busy. Happy Bday Aunt Danielle! I have pictures, but have to put them on the puter. I'll try to do it asap, but not tonight, I still have to pack Lucas' bag to visit Kathleen. Jeremiah is in Sedalia now, only about 90 minutes away, at a living facility. They're going to go visit him tommorrow and on tuesday. thats all for now, I need to get doing stuff!

been tooo long

KINDYGRAD!!!!






I stayed up 2 nights, almost all night, making those hats out of craft foam and hot glue. See the tassles? Hand braided embroidery floss. It wasn't in the budget, but I wasn't letting those babys not have something special. Aren't they too cute? Dont they look so proud of themselves?

"What's a cripple?"

SO, yesterday, as we were leaving Lucas' school, one of the older classes and teacher were exiting the gym. As we walked past, the teacher made a "joke," because her students were apperently moving her along too quickly for her taste. As we walk by, she says, "Hold on, I know I cant move as fast as you, but it's not like I'm a cripple! Ha-ha-ha!" Lucas turns to me, holding my hand and says, "Mom, what's a cripple?" All big-eyed and innocent. I tell him, "Well, it's kind of a not very nice way of saying Handicapped." We recently had a discussion about what handicapped was, when he noticed the hanging placard in some cars, Like Grandma Kathleens, or Grannies.
When I told him that that was what he meant, He said, "You mean, like my Dad?" and I went "Yeah, I guess she wasn't thinking about what she said. Everybody forgets things sometimes."
I thought all was okay, until, about half way home, over the Radio Disney bumpin' through the car, (Part of our after school routine,) I heard him sobbing in the back seat. I ask what's wrong, and he says, though I'm paraphrasing, that his feelings are hurt because anyone would cal his Daddy any name, and that there is a bad name for people who cant do things, and why would that teacher say that, and it's not fair, and he loves his Daddy.
It's just such BS. Some people just don't think.

he's finally asleep

finally. bedtime for mama! yay!

why cant i sleep?

I'm tired, ive been up since 5:30 or so. I just cant sleep. I'll go try again, have to get up to get Munchkin ready for school in the morning. There are only 12 days of the school year left, (not counting weekends,) yay! then I'll have al day with my little buddy. I'm so happy we bought the Friends of the Zoo membership though. We've used it so much in the past month, the expense is more than covered. And, we get into other Zoos for free. They advertise on the card, "Free Tickets to the St. Louis Zoo!" and I laugh...

I musta meant a mommy tomorrow.

And that can be a long time.
Anyway, Aidan has allergies. Bad ones. Just like Lucas used to. But, he's getting better, thanks to Benadryl. He also turns in circles, not quite crawling, and scoots backward. He also walks well,l if you hold him up under his arms.
Lucas can ride a bike all by himself now, no training wheels. He's getting really good, but a little cocky, skidding to a stop and letting his back wheel drift and throw up dust. He may seriously hurt himself soon. but, he's having fun. He's learning to tell time, and has had the same little girlfriend, Kayliegh, for a few months now. They're so cute, holding hands and reading to each other.
Pictures later, I have to take them off the camera.

I promise

I'll actually update tomorrow. Really.

Been so busy!

We've been so busy. Aidan's had an ear infection, followed by a virus. He's teething. he's 6 months old today, you know! He's wearing size 12 mo, and weighs 22 lbs.(almost) he's got the doctor on monday, and gets bloodwork and shots if he's well. he's been sleeping in his crib at night, usually until 2-3 am. he still wants to eat at night.
Lucas is on his way to IL right now. If I have to give up a holiday, let it be easter, i guess. Lucas has also lost 2 teeth, one a week ago, and one today. theyre on the bottom, not right in front, but the next two. he has the cutest smile now!
i'm hungry and tired, so, i'm gonna go eat while Aidan is napping!